I feel so unprepared to enter college..  I’d be more excited if I were going to the school I actually wanted to go to…Oh, life. Please go my way this year. 

There are many moments where I wish I still had a father figure in my life.

However, that’s life for you,  gives you what you need, but leaves you wanting more.

I guess, I just need to learn to appreciate the ppl who didn’t choose to leave my life and spend my time creating more wonderful memories with them. idk :/

How many children do you want to have?

Sometimes when I am asked about this question regarding my future, I think back to the childhood that I had with my sister. I instantly remember the good memories and quickly reply with “A lot, I want my kids to grow up with an unbreakable bond with their siblings!” Thinking how close I am/was with my sister, a smile breaks upon my face, but as I begin to ponder more about it now, that unbreakable bond that once was there, did it really exist or was I merely fooling myself? It seems lately that all my talks with my sister are discouraging and ends up with a blasted argument. My mother is not much help either, she always seem to put my sister on a higher pedestal.

Now when asked this question, I honestly do not have an answer. As much as I want to believe every child should have a sibling to play with, what if my second child will feel just like how I’m feeling? Insignificant, unimportant. Do I really want a child of mine to go through this? No sireee. Maybe parenting style plays an important factor to this, but if I become anything like my mother, I think I would only be fit to have one.